The Suspicious and Timely death of Father Anthony de Mello, SJ.

There seems a depressing inevitability about the fate of those who would challenge the established order, and engage popular support. Martin Luther King and Malcolm X come readily to mind, and of course President Kennedy. Undoubtedly people who had made powerful enemies but had also polarised various social, religious and political groups enough to conjure a host of scapegoats and confusion. Where the heavy finger of blame points in only one direction, subtler methods are required.


Tony was a rising star in the Catholic Church. OK, at 55 he was no spring chicken, but nevertheless by comparison to the higher orders, he was youthful indeed. Tony founded the Sadhana institute in 1973, which over the years gained an international reputation, along with its founder. Tony found himself frequently jetting around the world giving conferences and talks and gaining ever more popularity with an increasing audience.

Tony captivated audiences with simple stories, parables and sayings from across culture and religion: Chinese, Indian, American, Christian, Muslim, Buddhist… using them as gateways to understanding, windows upon awareness. Moreover, Tony held a deep appreciation for scripture, the messages, signposts held within, and the early Christian mystics whose writings he blended seamlessly with spiritual wisdom, from wherever it came.

Come the mid ’80s, although resistant at first, Tony allowed occasional recordings of his talks. In 1986 he gave his first videoed conference, ‘Wake up to Life!’, held over four days in New York. It was an enormous success, Tony appeared to be going places.


I knew nothing of Tony at this time, I’d been C of E and lapsed somewhat. In fact I’d found more sense in Daoism and Buddhism so had focused my spiritual journey there. When it came to Catholicism, my connection, hence understanding, had consisted of little more than, ‘In God’s Name’ by David Yallop (arguing Pope John Paul I was assassinated because he was about to curtail the Vatican Bank’s money laundering for the Mafia and return the Church to the poor), ‘The Holy Blood and the Holy Grail’ by Michael Baigent et al. (which, amongst other things, examines the construction and editing of the Bible and Rome’s attempts at exterminating dissidence), and ‘Father Ted’, so ‘followers of the faith’ were unlikely to be top of my reading list.

Not long after the Internet came into being, a friend who is prone to such things, sent me a quote from Anthony de Mello:

“You are so proud of your intelligence”, said the master. “You are like a condemned man proud of the vastness of his prison cell”.

I liked it very much. It sat comfortably with someone who, at least academically, was intellectually challenged. In fact, it was a great source of comfort as I fought my way through three years of International Relations Theory at university.

Never really thought any more about it after uni, until browsing in a London book store, wanting something for my return journey to Aberystwyth, when I came across ‘Sadhana: a way to God – Christian exercises in Eastern form’. When I read Anthony de Mello was a Jesuit priest I almost retuned the book to the shelf, almost, but… something stayed me. It is important, as I would hear Tony tell me, just a day or so hence, not to let prejudice stain my window.

Sadhana was a joy. To be honest it transformed my picture of what Christianity could be. Tony made such simple, wholesome sense, seamlessly tying east and west. In fact, what Tony was saying, seemed to me the antithesis of Catholicism as I had understood it.

And indeed, although willing to reappraise my opinion, given the shining beacon of Tony, and as I was to discover, some remarkably brave nuns and priests in Latin America, I could find little, or nothing, to substantially challenge my original position. For as I examined recent Papal decisions and actions in relation to censuring and silencing campaigning priests, organised crime, child abuse, financial dealings, power… the actions appeared as autocratic, unanswerable, arbitrary as ever. With the fearsome Herr Ratzinger appearing as Pope John Paul II’s henchman for throttling dissidence.


Tony must have been a big, big problem. Tony would not be silenced, he was here to dance his dance. He spoke his truth in a simple, logical, understandable way, engaging with increasing numbers as word spread. His 1986 tour of the US, as mentioned above, was a huge success. Unfortunately, all the video footage of the four day conference was destroyed, leaving just eight hours of audio (of which most would be published as ‘Awareness’ some three years later).

1987, a year on, Tony is back in the States, ready for his summer tour. Surely this year there would be no such accident, backups would be made, safeguards put in place. ‘Tony, the video’ was about to go public through every Catholic bookshop worldwide! A most unpalatable prospect for the powers that be.


It would be a futile exercise to attempt to uncover any validity behind the possible assassination of Tony. As a priest within the Jesuit order, he would be effectively encased within their system. Their meals, their autopsy, their press release, no need for external examination. So we see motivation, means and method, but that is all, and as Tony would advise us, one must keep an open mind, open to, and awareness of, each and every possibility and eventuality.

Assassination or not, for Herr Ratzinger, Tony’s death was a timely ‘Godsend’. Unfortunately for Ratzinger, Tony’s work did not dry up. Posthumously published works appeared and interpretations also began to surface. He was not best pleased. On Ratzinger’s request the Vatican banned Tony’s books, however, finding the ban unworkable, this was transmuted to a ‘Notification’, penned by Ratzinger and authorised by Pope John Paul II, placed in all Tony’s books warning Catholics away from such dangerous and subversive teaching.


Tony represented a potential schism in the Church, encouraging people to become aware, to think for themselves, rather than let the Church, or any ideology do it for them.

“To doubt”, Tony argues, “is infinitely more important than adoration… to question is so much more important than to believe”.

Everywhere people are searching for objects to adore, but I don’t find people awake enough in their attitudes and convictions. How happy we would be if terrorists would adore their ideology less and question more. However, we don’t like to apply that to ourselves; we think we’re all right and the terrorists are wrong. But a terrorist to you is a martyr to the other side.

The process that we use for making a St. Francis Xavier could be exactly the same process used for producing terrorists.

What is scripture, then? It’s a hint, a clue, not a description. The fanaticism of one sincere believer who thinks he knows causes more evil than the united efforts of two hundred rogues. It’s terrifying to see what sincere believers will do because they think they know. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if we had a world where everybody said, “We don’t know”?

Unfortunately Tony’s observations on the scriptures did not survive the accident, but having gone over the eight remaining hours of the ‘Wake up to Life!’ conference tapes times past counting (cutting, splicing, reordering, editing… (it appears as if no one cared for these recordings) a long and would be tedious process, if not for the joy of listening to Tony and his insights) the few biblical observations which did survive paint a remarkably different picture to the one presented as Truth by religious hierarchy.

“Sleeping people read the scriptures and crucify the Messiah on the basis of them.” Tony is not limiting his observation to lay people, but challenging all, citing examples of priests and religious scholars who, through the Bible and enculturation, lose sight of deeper meaning, preferring attachment to understanding.

Awareness, awareness, awareness – the message is so simple, yet complex as life itself. To find awareness one must first shatter illusions, get deprogrammed, remove the control that society has imposed. So what about Tony’s awareness? Tony’s deprogramming? Tony’s society?

One can of course only speculate, and it is most difficult to see that which surrounds us, pervades us (like, to use one of Tony’s analogies, the little fish in the ocean: “Excuse me, I’m looking for the ocean. Can you tell me where I can find it?”), however, from examining Tony’s words, I believe he was under few illusions about Catholicism, and the ruthlessness of its hierarchy.

One might even suggest he was poking fun or taunting them, with all his talk of awareness, understanding, discovery, and not taking the Bible literally, which flies in the face of those with an interest in power and control, who prefer blind obedience and subservience. Further, in his condemnation of religion Tony suggests the Church falls prey to idolatry: a mental idol, producing “the more dangerous idol worshippers”.

“All revelations, however divine, are never any more than a finger pointing to the moon… When the sage points at the moon, all the idiot sees is the finger.” Tony is not of course limiting his observation to Catholicism or Christianity but religion in general and the idols: texts, symbols, rituals, which too often become a “barrier to getting in touch with reality, because sooner or later we forget that the words are not the thing. The concept is not the same as the reality. They’re different… The final barrier to finding God is the word “God” itself and the concept of God.” “You miss God because you think you know. That’s the terrible thing about religion.”

Tony is universally scathing of nations and governments of all kinds, “I don’t know of one government, not one, that is selfless, individuals perhaps, but governments, oh, oh, oh”. Can Tony, in his awareness, be overlooking the government in Rome?

I wondered at his tenacity, fearlessness, abandon, and I am tempted to say foolhardiness, as he jokes, perhaps?, of becoming Pope (edited out of the book), questioning the honesty and capacity of priests and pouring scorn on weeping for one’s sins – “a great religious distraction”, says Tony. “That’s not what repent means: wake up! Become aware! What’s the use of weeping for your sins, which you committed while you were asleep anyway?” But, Tony also informs us, you cannot truly live until you have abandoned fear, and fear of death.

And Tony shows no fear, as he enters into the heat of battle, with his heart at the lotus feet of the Lord (“should I battle my relatives? Go right ahead, do your duty”).

He is not threatened by criticism, he does not care what you think of him or what you say about him. He’s cut all those strings: he’s not a puppet any longer.

“He’s terrifying. So we’ve got to get rid of him. He tells the truth: he has become fearless: he has stopped being human.”

Human! Behold! A human being at last! He broke out of his slavery, broke out of their prison.

This is Tony from ‘wake up to life, 86’. Jesus appeared as the immediate example in my mind, but the more I examined Tony’s words the more I found challenges to Rome, its orthodoxy and references to their potential response. Is it in any way possible that Tony could be blind to the anger his perspective generated amongst Church hierarchy? Or is he predicting his fate?

Tony finishes the conference with his wonderful story of ‘the man who invented fire’, who shared his invention with the cold and hungry and so enraged and terrified the priests that they got rid of him. Again, this could be reference to Jesus, yet it might just as readily apply to the man who rediscovered it.


document with references available for download at Scribd

‘Awareness’ by Anthony de Mello, 8 CDs torrent file

other resources at



  1. I feel there is something wrong about this man. Deep within the Conspiracy research I found Jesus Christ to be the power to stand against Satan who is in charge of the powers that be, not long did I. Jesus Christ for the first time made so much sense to me, seriously – I’ve been through witchcraft, buddhism, hinduism, taoism and many other things and I always thought Jesus Christ was of that level. You know – as this guy tells you. This Jesuit, who avoids naming Jesus Christ and even goes as far as calling him “this guy Jesus” and puts His truths on the same level as those of pagan religions and general “spiritualism” of “don’t give a fuck”. Anyway, today I listened to this guy for a few hours to check him out. At one point I started trusting him because I know how he thinks, I have lived as he says you should for quite some while – until I found the Next Level, that of Jesus Christ, of God. Shit, and the trouble is that he pulled me down to that darned level of mere happiness, of mere bliss which is so much lower of that level of Christ. And I feel so saddened now for my fresh Love for Christ got swayed in such a silly little way. I know God loves me and will help me get back on track, but I am really dissapointed about this. I should have expected this backstab from a Jesuit who claims to be willing to be the Witch General a.k.a. Pope.
    Be careful, guys! He gives fake liberation, that of self-love, that of Luciferian perspective. Highly dangerous stuff – and you never know it when you’re in it, when you’ve never met Jesus. And I really don’t mean to be “religious”, I am strongly against any authority, but The Creator is just simply above anything in this haughty world and thus remains the Everlasting Teacher which I got separated from today because of re-checking places I know to be unworthy.
    Be blessed, my brothers in arms, this battle is the holy war and we ought to stand by Christ on Gods side.

    • Where or how did you know about Jesus Christ? Have you listened to his teachings, his parables, or are you standing behind his mere name because it gives you the illusion of safety, the same way other people feel safe behind names like ‘Armani’, ‘Master Card’ or ‘Oxford University’? Don’t care about Jesus, care about the people that might need you, starting by yourself. That’s what he wanted us to do. But maybe you’ve changed since March 25, 2009, and maybe I’m wrong, and this comment is no longer necessary.

      • Yes, I have grown quite a lot, my faith is true and thriving.
        And, if Jesus were not God, there would be no point in following His teachings, for He would be yet another madman, blabbering about being God, but Him dying and being raised from the dead (amongst all His other unparalelled mirracles) decisively proves Him being God (+the witness of the Holy Spirit in every Christian’s heart and life), which means that His words were true. And what He said (and what the whole point of the Bible is), is that we are all sinners and God hates sin. Yet – try however you might, you will never become perfect or pleasant to God, for He really hates sin. So basically – you can try to follow all the Christs teachings, but they are no use, because you have sinned anyway – and will in the future – thus actually deserving hell. So the central point of the Bible (to which every other tiny detail of the Bible points) is that God brings us the sacrifice for our sins, which can only be taken by faith. Repent of your sins, regret your sinfullness, and plead God for mercy – and receive His loving gift, His only son, who suffered every bit of the eternal punishment we all deserve – and that is the Truth. And knowing the Truth sets us Free. Christ is the Truth, the Way, the Life. Within ourselves, try however you might, is only sin and depravity. All else is just a pretence.
        So Jesus Christ is not a “safe spot” to be in, quite the opposite – I am not from or in USA, and in the rest of the world being a Christian is almost a sure threat to your well being. True Christians all over the world keep to their faith not because it is safe, but because it is TRUE. And this Truth is available to all through hearing this message of God’s wrath and God’s mercy, and accepting in faith Jesus Christ, God the Son as the one who took the punishment for you, if you believe in Him. And I do. And it is tough. But thank God, nothing compares to the Truth.

      • lets hope so

    • I carried Anthony’s Book ‘The Way to Love’ for 12 years before I understood it. I had a spiritual awakening because of his wrightings. I am now awake and have the big picture. Love and freedom is Jesus but for those who are not awake all they can see is the literal meaning. I compared Anthony’s righting with an old Bible early 1900,s. It says exactly what he wrote.
      I have been able to free the minds of many to see the truth. I am a Christian but I know that the kingdom of god is inside us and all around us. While the world searches outside of them selves, some of us because of Anthony found the truth of who we are from within. I will be forever grateful for such a beautiful gift of Love and freedom. But I will also ask how many more of Gods messengers will we nail to a cross. When Jesus was confronted by the Pharisees they asked him why have you come? He said so that the blind may see and those who can see would be blind. In their arrogance they said “ Well we can see” and than Jesus said That is why you are blind. God forgive them for they know not what they do.

    • You claim to know Jesus and you slam someone who tries to help people understand about Him but the language you use above makes me wonder who it is you know.

    • Yes as Tony says, people like you (and me) don’t want to wake up. The “holy war” as you put it will keep us all separated and killing each other in the name of religion whether it is about Christ or the Koran or whatever. What Tony is saying threatens people who like to be in control, either at a personal or political level. No one can teach you about God, no one has that authority, though there are plenty of people who would like to think they do. What they have is what Tony describes “other people’s ideas”. Christ, Buddha and Tony understand this. I choose to find my own God, be it a great spirit, a meeting with another being or the wind or whatever. I have no authority to teach anyone what to believe but what I do have is the ability to understand myself and that allows me to be safe in any beings company.

    • @Salem

      You say” Be careful, guys! He gives fake liberation, that of self-love, that of Luciferian perspective”

      Self love? Show me one sentence were Anthony de mello is speaking about self love? Were you sleeping when you were listening to him???

      • The guy teaches the NewAge doctrine.
        Jesus, on the other hand, said that nobody goes to the Father but by Him. Also Paul emphasised that faith only comes by hearing the Gospel of Christ. The only freedom you can ever have is through Christ and forgiveness of your sins. Sin is not an illusion. It won’t be when you’ll stand before the Almighty God sentencing you to everlasting Hell.
        But the mystic teachers try to lure into thinking that there is no good or evil – just like satan in the garden of Eden. Same old lies, same old illusions.
        I used to be an occultist, quite deeply involved with the devil. And I know the “liberation” the mystics speak about. BTW, you can get beyond that and actually find whom you’ve tapped in to. And that “force” is satan, not God. But God can save you from that. Through Jesus. Through faith in Him. Through the forgiveness He alone offers.

      • Olio,

        Where did your Bible come from? Learn about it first. Then speak of absolute truths. The doctrines you are referring to were compiled by a biased group of people who were just like you, with vested intetests.
        Wake up, beore its too late!

  2. i guess you’re agreeing with me then Salem, Tony’s words to the church are dangerous and subversive. who, rather than the “Luciferian perspective” of self love (and as a consequence love for all life), demand self hate: guilt and sin, suffering and damnation for all who do not submit to their order, in effect, hate for all life.

    man, that’s some weird fucking god you’ve got there, but more validation i believe for my argument 😀 thanks,


  3. Dear mothandrust, you, as all Illuminati brainwash victims, have misunderstood Jesus Christ in complete entirety. Jesus would be the first to burn the churches, the first to damn Vatican to Hell.
    I am saddened by your words because you are an example of another person who will never truly understand what life is about and what the direction of it is.
    As I said, I have been on that poor level of bliss. Of course, it is much, much higher than that of ordinary slave you see wearing a tie or a diamond ring or any of the worldly shit people waste themselves on. Bliss and the “freedom” of what I call Tao is great, but how much infinitely greater is Jesus Christ and God and what They/He has to offer, you don’t realize and also you don’t understand that there is not a bit of guilt involved in true fellowship of Christ and the sin has nothing to do with fear – it is a mentality of a slave to fear God in such a negative way. A true follower of Christ is full of His love, free of bondage to sin and filled with purpose for this life on this sinful, dirty, nasty planet. This world is far from perfect, this blog alone should tell you that “letting yourself go” or “going with the flow” will indoubtedly lure you into the Devils trap,that of Illuminati, that of NWO – and Christ is the only way to remain loving yet to be able to face Satan and fight him.
    I truly hope you will lose your pride in yourself and rise so much higher to reach the truth of Christ.
    God bless you!

  4. Salem, i have no interest in name calling, this “my god is better than your god” is inherently childish. it is also judgemental and Christ says “judge not lest ye be judged”. (there is nothing in this universe that is not a product/part of God, just as nothing is excluded from God’s divine plan.)

    recognise your own ‘sin’ but don’t impose that judgement upon others.

    you choose a hierarchical christ idol to which all must be servile, i prefer to empower the christ within.

    quite frankly Salem i’m not interested in a religious discussion with you, i’ve heard it all before. if you want to pick religious fights might i suggest CC’s ‘religion and occult’ forum.

    post on the subject matter or i’ll ignore/delete it.


    • mothandrust, I would say something for you to feel reassured that there’s others feeling the same way as you
      but I feel your inner guide and wisdom don’t really need more than this
      good luck to you and your kind
      peace and awareness

    • Are you all crazy!? Can’t you see that you’re just simply following the NewAge Luciferian doctrine!? I’m amazed at your submission!
      You’ve been brain-washed into a pantheistic, irresponsible, vain, purposeless ideology of NewAge.

      • And what are you brainwashed with? Age old tested bronze age myths?

  5. HI there, I’d just recently discovered Fr. de Mello’s teachings and got interested in the man, so read a bit about his life and death.
    There is a biography published online by his brother

    who claims they dined together in the canteen of Fordham University on the day Tony died. After dinner Tony complained of “stomach unease” and went to bed. He was found dead the next morning, lying on the floor.
    The bio says nothing about cause of death, or the findings of an autopsy or any other examination. Do you know if there is info about this online?

    While I’m not ruling out any machinations from the Catholic Church, it seems somewhat improbable that, had they been the cause of his death, they would choose to do it in the USA where regulations and a follow-up investigation, I believe, must be way more serious than in India.
    To pioson Tony at the canteen of Fordham University in New York seems to require a vast amount of influence and energy to make all clues disappear. Just doens’t seem likely.

    What are your thoughts?

    • in India Tony was surrounded by friends.

      “Fordham University … was founded by the Roman Catholic Diocese of New York in 1841 as St. John’s College, placed in the care of the Society of Jesus shortly thereafter, and has since become an independent institution under a lay Board of Trustees which describes the university as ‘in the Jesuit tradition’.” (Wikipedia)

      “As a priest within the Jesuit order, he would be effectively encased within their system. Their meals, their autopsy, their press release, no need for external examination”

      so, this would be the perfect place to carry out the assassination. note, there was no public autopsy, as would be required for you or i.

      • IF the law required no public autopsy then yes, it seems convenient. Are you sure this is the case? On what basis would they claim the right for a private autopsy?
        I’m not from the US and I know in my country this would be out of the question.

        Was there ever a formal accusation made by relatives or friends of Tony?

      • tbh Oksana i don’t know, but i can’t find any details, and through history poisoning has been a favoured method of Catholic hierarchy for disposing of undesirables. as far as i know there were no claims from family or friends, or even the wider public at large, but then, all his immediate associates were Catholic, as were the majority of his audience, and as we know, people tend to be blind to that which surrounds them.

        i’m making an observation not an accusation and highlighting how unpleasant the church’s hierarchy found his views and why his death was so timely for them.

  6. Obviously he was murdered by the modern inquisitors; that is, by the Vatican.

  7. No, he can’t. You’re right. He couldn’t be unaware of the Global Roman Empire in the form of the church institution with its spiritually embedded billion people (Milliarden-Volk) and much much more highly sophisticated power structures within all governments around the world, leading to effective world government since at least 1945 with the second Thirty Years’ “World War” and Hiroshima/Nagasaki.
    Q: “Should I battle my relatives?”
    A: “Go right ahead, do your duty.”
    That’s what Ignatius of Loyola and Eric Jon Phelps are saying exactly the same way.
    “This could be reference to Jesus” OR to the fiery saint in person.
    What an inspiration this article is! Thanks, man.

  8. To me, Anthony de Mello was a “role-model. He was “awaken”, I think. It’s pretty “…uncorfortable to be awaken. We’d rather be fast asleep.” he would say. Why are so many of us so disturbed emotionally to the things he was saying? Is it because it’s true? Why don’t we have the guts to simply accept to ourselves that we do do them (sometimes), huh? We wouldn’t be bothered one bit if we didn’t do the things he was saying that we normally say “upset” us. Does this makes sense to us? This, to me is part of “waking up”. I’ve got a beautiful saying in Spanish (Spain) for this, i.e. “El que se pica, ajos come”, which could loosely be translated into “The one who eats garlic feels hot in their mouth” If you didn’t eat it, you wouldn’t feel the hot spicy taste of it, would you?

  9. Here’s a link to the only conference actually videotaped of Tony. Not the whole thing, the audio is not great, but still worth watching (the link is only to part 1)

  10. Hi, I have to add that Anthony de Mello woke me up from my sleep, I feltl who I am for the first time in a long time because of the deprogramming he used on us, it was very special.

    He was a very spiritual man but even more important he was awake, this is key.

  11. I tend to believe that Anthoney was most likely poisoned as well. In one story he tells the tale of the man who taught people how to make fire and how he become popular and so he was poisoned. Was he telling us about the methods used by the Church?

    his message is what we should remember above all else, to spread the truth about being awake, not arguing about details and rituals.

  12. I have been studying/practising Tony’s work for some time now. I understand that people will be interested in the whys and hows of his death, but we know Tony would not be concerned about that, he was not attached to his life. The catholic church has it’s own agenda and like any institution, it does not wish to have it’s power threatened by anyone, especially one who has no unnatural fear of them. Tony speaks the truth, we know when we hear the truth if fear has not blocked it, the answers to what life is about cannot be fully answered whilst we are in human form, it is designed that way! What we can do is connect as closely as possible to our true nature, we do that by dropping attachments to the earthly distractions, this is Tony’s message, simple , not easy but it is the truth.

    • Nicely put!

    • Surrendering, detachment, radical acceptance. You are right!

  13. no one can teach a fish to find the ocean. Answer your own question TS




  15. Please out of respect for the late Anthony de mello, take it ealse where. You are a seeker, When you find, all of this will no longer matter. I sugjest you observe and not judge.

  16. Anthony would have said, the question you should ask is not who Jesus was, but who you are. It is not as important how he died as to how he lived. Yes he told Jesus Christ’s truth because he could see.
    Most of us don’t like organized religion, because we all have the deepest need to be free. But freedom comes from within us. You have to ask yourself is mankind ready for that responsibility? If you are awake you know there is no sin just responsibility. The Church dose the best it can to offer structure to control the masses and stay in control. Are people ready to know that life is a free fall, can they understand it? Awareness and being awake is the next step in mankind’s development, but it starts at home. If you wake up one he will wake up two than six, twelve and so on. Some of us have been given the gift of being awake, but with it comes responsibility. From what I have seen out there its going to take a very long time before people are going to be ready. Just read these comments they are still on the journey.
    Don’t ever think that there are not those who know the truth and are awake within the walls of the church. Do you think they should tell the truth, is mankind truly ready for that? It’s the same old story for 5000 years. You can not change it overnight. Better to find out who you are, because that is the only thing that truly matters and that will contribute by example to push us forward. We must teach our children to be aware and how perception can blind us. Do not teach them through fear, because it dose not work. The truth dose not come with a threat attached to it. People are not buying the program anymore it has begun. The second coming of Jesus comes from within and starts in our hearts. Look for him in the here and now its never been about the here after.
    Jesus Christ is my hero and he is God, and have no doubt he is very much alive. Seek and you shall find him inside your heart and hear his voice. We are all sons of God. God remembers not the past he is in the here and now. It is us who judge, it is us who bring the past forward. God loves you for who you are in this moment. That is the true meaning of Gods son. But to truly know this you must unlearn everything and die to self so you can see.
    Good luck on your journey those of you that seek. May you find the love and freedom I have found.

    • What you have found is called “foolishness” by the Bible. Indeed, you have twisted the Scripture beyond all recognition and have made the cross of Christ “of none effect” (1. Cor 1:17).
      We are not saved by what Jesus taught. We are only saved through faith in His blood shed on the Cross for our sins that deserve eternal punishment. From “within” come “thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness” (Mk. 7:22-23), the heart of man is naturally evil and totally corrupt (Jer. 17:9).
      So, get behind me, Satan, with your “hath God really said” and other lies! You have been defeated by God Almighty and by the Cross of Christ, and Hell is your eternal prize for your foolishness.
      You shall fall before God’s Glory and before the King of Kings, the Slain Lamb, willingly or unwillingly – you will take non of His Majesty away by your demonic lies.

      • Wow!!!! You are pure love…UHHHH?
        Why so much agression?….What are you protecting?

  17. Anthony de mello. i don’t know why everyone’s talking bout god and church and jesus and satan and so on and so on and on and on and on… and oh my god i got a headache! haha
    anyways jus wanna say.. anthony de mello what a wonderful man. a man who speaks words that move everything inside of me. words that shake everything i thought i knew about myself, words that sooth me and words that sting. but all in all words and wisdom that move me forward and give me peace. words that put a smile on my face and make me glad that i am alive, breathing today.
    Love is what i hope to preach, as did he and i hope you remember today that love is all there is and forget bout being right or being wrong or if you’re saying something that will change someone’s world , but say what changes your world and speak the words that make your heart soar. and you know when its good coz you’ll feel it in your gut and nothing can shake that goodness coz it knows no limits and it has no end.
    that’s enough for now, you know what i am getting at (i hope). let go and be free and forget all this crap, you know what matters in the end so be happy 🙂
    lov u people.

  18. We all come into this world and have to encounter both boundless love and boundless fear and may we all be blessed, I say. On the boundless fear side, there is of course the immediate necessity of maximum control. In the cause of maximum control, it’s difficult to imagine that murder would not be utilized.

    I just read De Mello’s “Awareness” and like our helpful informative blogger mothandrust was quite won over though I began it with a jaded and cynical attitude. I wanted to know more about this author, so surprisingly unworshipful of external authority. The Wikipedia line – “he died suddenly in 1987” was so unsatisfactory that I did more searching and so arrived here.

    And what I find is the in-itself sadly beautiful tone of resignation from mothandrust, and mothandrust’s thoughts on the circumstances of this inspiring person’s death. “Behold, I am making all things new,” says God in Revelation. OK, I’m watching.

  19. For people like SMJ and others would like toknow more about tony, a biography of tony has jsut come out a month or so ago:
    Anthony deMello SJ, The Happy Wanderer – A tribute to my brother is written by Bill deMello and edited by Clifford W. DeSilva.
    The book was launched on 22nd April 2012 at a small function at St. Peter’s Church Complex, Bandra, Mumbai, India.
    Instead of the usual method of a ribbon being cut by some prominent person, Bill deMello chose to have the book ‘launched’ by Tony deMello himself.
    Bill welcomed the select gathering and thanked all who had labored to make the launch day a success and explained that the book was a tribute to his brother and was written with the view to promoting his books especially among the young. Bill then played a rare, unpublished recording of Tony celebrating Mass on his 50th Birthday. Relevant sections of this recording of Tony speaking and also singing while accompanying himself on the guitar were played. Tony’s own words explained the meaning of ‘Happy Wanderer ‘ (the song) as a good example of sanyas. We are merely passing through this world so we need the minimum.
    That was it. There were none of the usual speeches by ’eminent’ persons and so on that accompany such occasions. Simplicity itself.
    The book is published by Jesuit publishers, Gujarat Sahitya Prakash, Anand who are the authentic publishers of all of Tony’s books in India (
    Clifford W. DeSilva

  20. Salem, where in the bible did Jesus ever proclaim that he is God? You’re putting words in his mouth. All over the bible pages Jesus himself explicitly and repeatedly said he is NOT God. “Yo Brah, I am NOT God! Get up Don’t worship me! You addicts!”-Jesus. The Infinite IMMORTAL God cannot EVER die bro, how come this man Jesus died, huh? If God is immortal and cannot EVER die then obviously God is not the Jesus who actually died down here. Unless ofcourse if it’s a faked staged death by God?? DUH! And how come Jesus is praying to and addressing a God up there when he is the God himself? Don’t you think it’s crazy? That you have a god that could die and pray to someone else NOT himself, to someone who is UP THERE in Heaven while he/Jesus is down here praying to “that” God up there? Does God bleed?? Can you nail God to two pieces of wood? Is God a mere mortal man? Obviously NOT!! Whoever came up with a stupid distorted notion of mixing up the two separate entities?? Maybe some Opium Addict or a drunk bible scholar back in Rome who obviously has lost a grip of simple logic to distinguish. Oh yeah, and Jesus said himself REPEATEDLY on several scripts that he is NOT God, that The GOD is UP THERE! How many times in the bible did the main man Jesus said it like this: Yo man, I AM NOT God bro! Our God is up there! And I pray and answer to HIM who is NOT ME bro! Why da fuck are you insisting against what I just said on several occasions, bro?? Why are you making up shit? Are you on drugs?? Oh and so I got tortured and nailed to a cross and died AND then suddenly a rabbit with a basket full of painted eggs popped up from nowhere and stole the scene. WHAT DA FUCK! Whoever came up with those wild ideas, bro? Must be the same drunk addict with blind followers LIKE YOU. It’s insulting! And whoever unquestionably buy into THOSE wild ideas is shit from brains! BURN!

  21. I also wonder where in the scriptures does it refer to Santa Claus? or the word “Trinity”? or “Purgatory”? It’s nowhere to be found in there. Therefore, it must’ve been INVENTED and ADDED by some drunk opium addict bible scholar back in ROME who would readily brush off the topic of “Inquisition” when brought up! Now that’s some fucked up shit right there. And if you can’t smell that something fishy explicitly then you need to Awaken from the Matrix bro. It’s a totally fucked up shit!

  22. I’m gone to convey my little brother, that he should also pay a visit this blog on regular basis to take updated from most recent reports.

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  25. Anthony DeMello was a Great Being, a son of God, and an awakened, liberated One. Fearlessness is the hallmark of one who has seen and fear is certainly the hallmark of those who haven’t. Christ knows we have no shortage of those. He was a very serious threat to the business consortium called the “Vatican” with their self-given right to global mind control, their stupidity and idolatrous worship of money and power… and that is why he had to go. The parable of “the man who brought fire” would have been enough to get him erased. His books had been banned. His truth was healing. He was going global with his message. He was personable and convincing. Like Jesus, he was bad for business. He knew full well the risks he was taking but took them regardless.

    Such love was there! You see it… or you don’t. If you cannot see it, it is because your conditioning is making damn sure you don’t.

  26. Tony de Mello mentions Jiddhu Krishnamurti in a few places. I seriously conclude from reading Tony’s thought that It Is All A Distillation Of Krishnamurti’s philosophywith it’s constant recurring theme of AWARENESS. Krishnamurti simplified.Does anyone dare contradict me?!!
    In fact, I think Tony de Mello owes ALL of his thought to Krishnamurti, in my opinion. One difference: Tony has more of a sense of humour. He doesn’t take himself too seriously.

    • Except that Tony de Mello uses parables and stories to illustrate his teachings , which Jiddu Krishnamurti rarely used, if any. Anthony de Mello was also a trained psychologist and he used many references to his background as well in his teachings, so as to illustrate the difference between spirituality and psychology which Krishnamurti did not do..

      I actually got the impression of influences of zen in his works.

      Anthony de Mello had his own unique style and way of teaching while at the same time assimilating the distinctive teachings of other religious and spiritual traditions and moulding it to his own characteristic individuality.

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